On My Dark and Gloomy Mornings

Have you ever woken up miserable?

Where loneliness robed the feeling of “I’m forgotten?” When love is coldly foreign? When yesterday’s troubles play its death song and your feet march to its tempo as you go from the bed, to the bathroom, to the sofa?

Do you understand what I mean?

Well, let me give you one more description.

At the start of the day, yesterday’s burdens surface, chest concave, shoulders fall forward and chin lands on your chest. Before you know, your shoulders are greeting your knees. You lift your head slightly and the gym is nowhere in sight. It is then when you know, you are not stretching your limbs for your benefit. Unable to take a deep breath you sink lower dreading the day.

Yet, somehow, we must carry on with duties, responsibilities and live with a grateful heart. Really? Honestly? Let’s be real here. How?

I don’t know about you, but for me, that’s when light, movement or color captures my attention. It normally comes from low on the horizon or off the ground. Maybe because that’s where I’ve aimed my view.

Well, because of my state of mind, hurting heart or heavy soul, I don’t straighten up. I actually lower myself even more, to the point where I could hug my legs. It is then when I take a picture or two and something begins to shift inside of me.

The first change I notice happens in my thoughts, my focus is not on yesterday at all, it’s on the now, on what I’m seeing. Slowly my chin lifts off my chest.

Second thing which changes me, is an unexplainable joy. It begins to drip inside my heart. Each drop heals hurts, calms pains, clears my sight from worries and concerns. It is then when my posture begins to straighten and I look beyond myself.

Last, my surroundings remind me of truths; of priceless fortune, sparkling value and important significance. These truths mend my torn soul. Soon my shoulders are back and I smile because, I know, I matter.

But, I couldn’t have the changes happening in me if I couldn’t see the light, the movement and the color. But even if I didn’t notice these things, I wouldn’t know that I matter, if I didn’t believe on the truths of my own worth.

As long as I am alive, I have something to give to someone. I can hug, kiss, smile or speak a kind word. And if the day comes when I can’t do any of these, I pray that my face will remind anyone of what I use to be, do and give.

When, I’m at my lowest, I will continue to look for the light, movement and color. For they reveal a unique design outside and inside of me. Both perspectives point to riches for us to always seek.

May you find light, movement or color to remind you of your worth and significance. For you matter to me. Hugs and kisses. 😊

 

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You Can Always Return ~ Changed

BE AWARE

Genesis 3:6 When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate.

What’s looking good to you?
What’s bringing delight to your eye?
What’s being desirable?

What experience are you contemplating which will cause you to become wise?

Now, to make it more personal, change the word “what’s” to “who’s” on the first three questions.

You may not be planning to share your choice with anyone. But once guilt begins to eat you from the inside, it’ll change your moods effecting any relationship close to you.

Once you cross the bridge, you can come back, but you will not return the same. Wiser perhaps, from personal knowledge, but definitely consequences will cross back with you.

Be wise by hearing the Word of God and heed to its warning. It will save you from shattering hearts and damaging your own.

Walk humbly with the Lord today, as for tomorrow, that’s for another day.

Always On Time ~ Sunrise

On some winter
Alaskan mornings
During nautical twilight
I sit, wait and watch the sky

Gray, white clouds
Reshape themselves
Gliding apart like smoke
From an unseen chimney

As civil twilight
Lights up the heavens
My heart anticipates
What is yet to be seen, color

With great assurance
The sun rises on time
Painting the sky, the clouds
The water, the ice before me

Happiness and glee
Spreads for all to see,
To receive and to believe
I then go to live out a dream

Not Ready For The Holidays

When I take a photo like this one, I know it will speak to me later at some appointed time. Today was that time for it stirred my soul.

The reflecting colors of the morning sun relaxed my soul to the point that I could hear my heart. It brought joy and happiness and contentment. But there was more and I had to quiet my mind to hear my heart and find out why I wasn’t ready for the Holidays.

You see, I love Thanksgiving just as much as Christmas time because my children would come home. it matter not that they weren’t all present at the same time. Their different path didn’t allow them. During these holidays families everywhere take time to cross paths and we did the same. We came together and shared our lives. Was it all happy and full of joy, nope.

Differences will exist no matter how tight and blessed a family maybe. Issues did surface. Respect is what one must work on when people don’t see eye to eye. Which is difficult to give when one doesn’t feel accepted for who they are or valued. And, it is difficult to give when beliefs or ideals are not the same. The challenge is not how to get along while in the same house, but how to stay in touch when they all go their separate ways.

You know why I’m not ready for the Holidays? Because I’m going to miss out on the differences that my family would have brought home. I’ve learned, their differences expand my heart and broadened my perspective. Their paths have led them where I yet to go. They’ve seen what I yet to see and they have felt what I yet have felt. Not because I might not have been in those actual places, but I haven’t with them.

The telling that I will miss, is not in words, but in their eye twinkle, their lip curled, their hands jesters when they do speak or not say a word. It’s the energy they release in the room or when they see you. Whether it is positive or negative, it is still family and one knows where that person heart is at and how to care for them.

Then there’s the physical touch that does wonders to our souls. It sends messages that words can never describe. the presence of another person in the room or the holding of hands, or an embrace, melts differences away at least for that time. One must feel safe and not be judged to be real.

I will miss, the real moments of my family.

Plus, I will not experience the emptiness that is left when they are all gone. It’s in the emptiness that gratitude is intensified. This year, emptiness arrived early. My children will celebrate with other family members and/or friends. Only one child will be present at each Holiday. I’m grateful for this blessing.

Am I sad, no, not really. This is life and I will find the most from where I am. But I will miss out on the quietness in my heart after they all have returned to their own paths.

Like the reflection of the colors on this photo, I smile today out of gratitude for the reflections of the previous holidays, which I have much to be glad about. As for my children, they are on their path and will have many different experiences which they will tell me about next time we meet.

For now, I’ll enjoy the memories, like a good glass of wine and watch the sunset.

 

 

Clinging Faith

Tyndale Life Application Daily Devotion

Cling to your faith in Christ, and keep your conscience clear. For some people have deliberately violated their consciences; as a result, their faith has been shipwrecked.

— 1 Timothy 1:19 NLT

Insight
How can you hold on to a good conscience? Treasure your faith in Christ more than anything else and do what you know is right. Each time you deliberately ignore your conscience, you are hardening your heart. Over a period of time your capacity to tell right from wrong will diminish.
Challenge

As you walk with God, he will speak to you through your conscience, letting you know the difference between right and wrong. Be sure to act on those inner tugs so that you do what is right—then your conscience will remain clear.

© 2010 by Tyndale House Publishers
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lord, when hard news come our way, it rocks our clinging faith in you. Humanely we began with the question which begin with the word why. Then we become angry, upset or disappointed and we react from those emotions.

Helps us Lord, to give ourself time for you to come and tend to our state of confusion and hurt. We may be in need of a spiritual time out, then we will not react from our fear or anger and violate our consciousness and sin.

Lord help us to keep a clean conscience during this time of the year when family draws near with one another. May we not shipwreck our faith.

Help us yo start our day with you and remain with you. Then any shaking which may come will not remove or shipwreck our clinging faith in you. In Jesus name I ask. Amen.

Thank you lord for gifting me with photography and writing. May they bring you glory and praise all the days of my life.

Such A Time As This

A DEVOTIONAL INSERT ~ From Biblehub

“Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?”

— Esther 4:14 NLT

“Although we believe God shows us the way, it doesn’t follow that we have a perfect understanding of where He’s taking us and why.

When David contemplated the hand of God guiding him, when he saw that God had hemmed him in “behind and before,” he declared that such “knowledge was too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain” (Psalm 139:5-6).

It is true that God gives us glimpses of where He’s taking us from time to time, but at bottom such knowledge is beyond human comprehension. We don’t follow God because we’ve seen and pre-approved His direction for our lives, but because we trust Him.

But then the moment arrives when it all makes sense, when the goal becomes clear.

Surely Esther did not want to become a harem girl, surely she did not know why she became queen, but the moment came when God’s purpose was revealed. Mordecai’s words of our verse are rhetorical. Clearly, obviously, God had brought her to this point in time so she could help her people.

Although God did not previously reveal His purpose, He was speaking forcefully now through the circumstances of life and Mordecai knew exactly what Esther had to do.”

My thoughts:

To the queens out there, who’s your Mordecai?

Who is reminding you of why God has brought you to such a time as this?

Who is helping you see and understand why God permitted for you to be placed where you are, experiencing something you didn’t willingly sign up to do?

Lord, help us to endure the place you have us at and not miss the glorious blessing you will do through us after we have suffer for a little while.

While the tormenting makes us desire to run away, give us wisdom and boldness to persevere and listen to wise, godly counsel.

Lord, may we rise to the challenge like Queen Easter and allow your Holy Spirit to lead and guide us to our “such a time as this” moments in our lives as unbearable as they may be.

In Jesus name I ask. Amen.