If You Ever Find My Phone

IF YOU EVER FIND MY PHONE

If you ever find my phone, you will see all the pictures I’ve taken in the past few months.

They will show the beauty, the detail, the moment, the color, the morning, the evening, the sky, the sea, the tree, the leaf, the moose, the bear, the rabbit, the flower, the people with me, all the life around me.

But, it will never show my storms, my waves, my turmoil, my pain, my tears, my sadness, my sleepless nights, those are not the things I chose to focus on.

Yet, those experiences are what move me to take the picture of what is right before me as I hold on for dear life to the purpose of living with hope, by faith and in love.

My life is a well of emotions which helps me to pull from to write, to share, to connect with others and those whom I may not physically touch, yet understand by our similar thoughts, emotions and unspoken circumstances.

We all have wild waves to survive. Maybe even ride out in this very moment. If we do ride our waves out, survive their overwhelming power, they will push us to solid ground.

Then, we can give an encouraging word to the ones still out at sea. Give a hand to the ones that got washed from the sea. Help others walk on the solid ground we are now walking on.

Let’s be compassionate to those around us who are drowning, tumbling, and sinking.

May they sense the hope we have in God; see our faith in our Savior and Lord, Jesus in us; and feel the love of God for humanity through us.

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Giving Up or Letting Go?

GIVING UP OR LETTING GO?

Woke up with the phrase, “thoughts can kill you or heal you,” and it wouldn’t leave me alone.

Seeking undestanding, I ask the Lord, “is this a theme for a story or something else?”

As I spent my quiet time, the phrase return and it brought another idea along. Not finding the proper words to put on this feeling, I looked for a photo to help me identify what the Holy Spirit was telling me.

When I saw the leaf, a question formed, “Is the leaf giving up or letting go?”

Knowing how God works and moves me or should I say pushes me to act upon what He sees in me, I knew a reminder was being handed for my mind.

Will I be giving up what has been done in me? Or letting go and accept the change which is in hand?

Many times, I fight thoughts which push me to give up and let the dream die.

It’s a real, true struggle within me!!!

One which produces melancholy even after workouts, walks and being out in nature for hours. Usually God wakes my spirit and soon I get myself moving by doing my duties of laundry and cleaning or paying bills.

My self talk goes something like this, “Lidia, you’re a grown woman, just keep taking steps. How else can you be a witness of what you’ve said you are in Christ?”

Why am telling you this? Because I’m not alone fighting a battle which we’ve been told it’s won. Yet, no relief has come. It diverted and missed us. Well, it feels like it has for what ever reason.

Instead of standing strong against the enemy. I do as he wants, be in the front battle zone fighting for my right to be who God said I am.

For many of us, the war exist in our head more than in our heart.

We struggle with thoughts which are killing us, inside out. Once our will is done with, we have no reason to exist. Meditate on God words, are daily pills, but our thoughts of redemption and healing remain dried up. (Rom. 12:2)

Then the dagger hits home, Hope is for others, not for me.

I shared my reoccurring waking thought with a friend over coffee this morning. I mention that I wasn’t sure if it was for a story. She suggested to write a story about twins, one with the name Ican’t and the other Ican.

After she left, I had my quiet time. It was them when I saw these twins, joined by one heart, in me.

Who will win?

The one who will remain standing strong and walk in the newness of who she has become.

Is it easy? Nope. I will confront that solid steep mountian God told me about.

It will seem unclimbable before me, but with the Lord’s help, I will get to the other side which is labeled, “accomplishement.”

Not sure what you’re struggling and doing battle with today, but be assured you are not alone even though it’s a lonesome road.

Today will you chose with me to dwell and meditate on the Victory which the Lord conquered for us through His resurrection?

Let’s encourage each other today as we stand with the banner of victory on our spear then walk in faith on what has already been done and accomplished in us. (Heb. 3:13)

You maybe on a different road, but we’re facing the same enemy. Let’s keep in mind the enemy is not only finished but CONQUERED! (John 19:30)

Fret Appeared As A Flick

Philippians 3:13-14 “I’m not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don’t get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I’ve got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I’m off and running, and I’m not turning back.” MSG

I received a phone call saying that one of my son’s is not doing well and is thinking of quitting his job for a lesser one.

Let me back up four months past.

My oldest son was involved in an automobile accident. He was rear ended by a van going at 60 mph totaling his car. He, his wife and two young son were in the car at the time. Thankfully, no one else was hurt, only him. After three months of recovery, he returned to work, but he’s not the same.

The neck injury is effecting one of his hand. He’s unable to hold on to things. As his mother, my heart broke again as I heard the news. This son has faced one challenge after another without much of a break. Some of those are of his own doing, but others came as magnets not releasing him until the lasting damages had taken its course, much like this one.

When I’m riding on God’s Eagles, His promises, like the verse in Philippians and receive heart tugging news of one of my children struggling, I want to land the eagle and ask my child to climb aboard.

But, I can’t.

I can only call and point to the Lord’s almighty eagle for them to climb on.

Before fret ignited full-blown worry in my soul, I pointed my son where the Holy Spirit led me. I couldn’t believe my eyes as read, Isaiah 4: 10.

“. . . I’ve picked you. I haven’t dropped you.’
Don’t panic. I’m with you.
    There’s no need to fear for I’m your God.
I’ll give you strength. I’ll help you.
    I’ll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you.” msg

My hope is that my son climbed aboard.

Trusting my God gave no room for the flame of worry to crash me to the ground of uncertainty and disbelief. I continued to soar on my eagle. For, I must press on to the goal God has before me.

Without a doubt, I knew the Lord reached down to my son. All my son needed to do was to take His Lord’s hand and climb on His promise.

Holly Spirit minister to my son’s spirit as you have minister to mine. Help him to hear what God wants him to know. Direct his path along the side his Savior. Lord, strengthen his faith and belief in You.

God, please give my husband and I wisdom on how to advice our son, or not to speak, plus being the godly parents he needs at this time. Thank you, for all you are doing and will do for my son and his beautiful family.

May you find encouragement in God’s word and my story.

Soar on Eagles Wings. (Click on soar and wings to listen to songs.)

 

WARNING ~ Nature Humbles

Keep in mind, once you cross, you must return with less. Otherwise, how else will you be able to fit through that small passage and come back?

Seriously, being out in nature can help shrinks problems, lessens troubles, relieves tension, plus reduce our waist line, if we adjusts our perspectives.

WARNING! Being out in the wild-of-less, it’s a humbling experience.

A Spiritual Lesson To Survive Life’s Storms

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of sympathy (pity and mercy) and the God [Who is the Source] of every comfort (consolation and encouragement), Who comforts (consoles and encourages) us in every trouble (calamity and affliction), so that we may also be able to comfort (console and encourage) those who are in any kind of trouble or distress, with the comfort (consolation and encouragement) with which we ourselves are comforted (consoled and encouraged) by God.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 AMPC

ABOVE THE CLOUDS ~ While one faces uncertainty, God lift us above the cloudy issues which surround us on any given day. The prayer of many assist us to stay afloat while God reminds or tells us how to live as storms approach.

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Will we listen? Or will we only survive with the few scraps that fall from his table? Will we act upon God’s truth and promises as facts?

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We are children of a King, expect great things. I’m not talking about tangible items, like money, houses or cars, which God can provide. But the one’s to focus on are hope, faith, belief and strength which come from our Abba Father. These are the ones that will keep our emotions, our thoughts and our words away from giving room to scenarios which may never happen. These ‘what ifs’ will drown us in our sorrows and true disappointments.

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Our Lord does gives us his strength to endure the discomforts we must face to survive the harshness of the tempest. It’s the spiritual blessings, gifts and supplies that come from him which we should take hold of when the dark days of depression, anxiety or hopelessness consume our lives.

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We can and will survive. We may be bruised, wounded and broken, but oh the stories we will have of how we saw His mighty hand over, under and at times surrounding us as we face and felt each blow.

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Stay faithful my fiends. Surround yourself with believers. Don’t let go of God’s promises. We will prevail, not by our strength, but the unity of God’s kingdom and the mighty hand of our Lord Jesus Christ.

The Dangers of holding Yourself Back

Stifling Dreams Create Nightmares

What talent am I suffocating, because of what if it takes off?

What ability am I quenching, because of what others may think of me?

What inspiration am I killing, because of what if it succeed?

Stifling our creativity harms not only ourselves, but those whom would have benefited from our work.

In a sense, we are not only killing our growth by withholding inspiration from the world around us, but we are keeping ourselves in the darkness of hopelessness.

Breakthroughs from stifle thinking, not only brings dreams alive, but give light for many other souls to hope again through our gifts, talents and works.

Be creative, spread insight, possibilities and imagination.

Allow your dream to take flight.

Fenced, Chained and Locked

FENCED, CHAINED AND LOCKED ~ Here is where I find myself more often than I want. The good thing is, it’s happening less and less as I discover what binds me down.

Many times I know what keeps me from escaping the prison I find myself in. It’s those darn fears, crippling insecurities, blinding doubts, and the cutting words of whom I’ve given power over me.

The question is what’s binding me today? Why can’t I get to where I want to be? Why is it that the work I honestly want to get done, seems impossible to reach?

It’s not all about the will, or the heart or even the mind that stops me. It’s what I’ve been told and have accepted as truth, which isn’t mine. The words which have been spoken over me, may have a ring of truth, but they have been dunk in the murky water of guilt and control.

Have you notice, that once you’ve accepted a truth from a love one, it weight you down? It may have not been noticeable right away, but in time you began to wonder, why am I moping around and not getting things done?

Then you give yourself that pep talk which has helped you before, but you find that it’s not working. As a faith person, you’ve cried out to God and ask him for help. Which He’s faithfulness never has let you down. Even so, the familiar pressure of the chain of hinderance wrap itself tighter and tighter around your mind, heart and eventually your soul. What do you do then?

Here is what I do, I pray and wait for God’s faithfulness to help me find what keeping in bondage. In the mean time I journal. If enlightenment of what weights me down doesn’t come, I call my mentor or a friend, whom knows my struggles and ask for prayer and insight.

Today, it was words, which held some truth but have been dunked in the murky water of guilt, jealousy, envy and control. I was made aware, to take responsibility of my neglects without the negativity that came with the truth.

What’s weighing you down? Why aren’t you able to accomplish the tasks you need to do or the projects you desire to do? Whom or what are you believing about your present self?

May you find the truth which unlocks the lock. May the chains of falsehood fall from your mind, heart and soul. But most important, may Truth set you free to take care of your responsibilities and to use your gift to your potential.

God bless you.

 

Broken Together

CAN WE REMAIN TOGETHER EVEN IF WE ARE BROKEN?

Marriage is hard, It’s an ongoing, challenging commitment. One, must keep believing not only in each other, but why one wanted to be united in the first place.

The song, Broke Together by Casting Crowns reminded me of a part of my wedding vow which I try hard to keep real in my heart, especially when turbulence shakes my marriage. When I’m standing on shaking grown from a disagreement, I recall the vow I try to keep alive, “For better or for worst, until death do us part.”

Then, I cry for help to the only One who can change not only my husband mind and heart, but mine. That’s if we’re willing. I’ve learned if I want my husband to change, I need to first look at what needs to be change in me. This idea works both ways, but one must be willing to allow God to show the truth of the circumstance and the truth about the person asking.

I’ll be truthful, before God begins to reveal what needs changing in me, I give him a piece of my mind. When I’m done with my whimpering and complaining, He reminds me to allow Him to hold all my hurting heart. It is then when I can hear truth. I’ve learned, things can’t improve, if I keep asking God to change him without changing me. Change can’t occur on both individuals, if we aren’t willing to see WHY we are part of the problem.

If I don’t ask God to change me, the problem and disharmony prolongs and will return quicker. After I see my faults and take ownership, then my husband begins to make amends. If I’m not at fault, I must remain steadfast in wanting to remain united and ask God to help my husband, as He helped me. Then I wait for God to help my husband, For God always waits on me.

A marriage is an art in progress that doesn’t stay beautiful. It can get ugly and messy. The problem is, we fall short of being patient, kind and loving, our brokenness shows up again and again. Our old nature returns and the explosion sends the mushroom cloud of destruction into the atmosphere.

It’s good to remind ourselves, we are broken people. But unlike Humpty Dumpty, we can be place back together again, every time we ask for help.

To fall less, we must acknowledge what tripped us. Was it fear, doubt, insecurities, selfishness, thoughtlessness or refusal to say, “It’s my fault. Please forgive me, for the hundredth time.” These are just a few things that causes the turbulence and shakes our commitment.

The dream of the perfect marriage doesn’t last. Realism comes as soon as the sun rises and one wakes up, But, hope is eternal. Hope in what God sees in your spouse and in yourself, instead of the broken parts of each other’s lives.

When you run out of love for your spouse, go to God, the maker of love, who gives freely to anyone who asks. HIs love, never runs out despite of how many times one falls.

If you are married or plan to get married, listen to the song, Broken Together and hold on to hope as you keep the promise for better or for worse. God bless our commitment to cherish and to hold.

Grateful ~ Liebster Award

My boat rocked and I was blown out of the water of creativity when I read a message on my blog from Megha’s World.

Megha nominated met to an award I knew nothing about, the Liebster Award.  Minutes earlier, I read on her blog, of her two nomination by two bloggers and wondered what the award was for. Not sure why, I overlooked my blog among the other nine she had named for this recognition.

Let me tell you what I like about her blogs , her poetry has its own unique style and flavor. Her writings are open-minded and heart touching. She weaves her own experiences and perceptions in a way which makes the piece easy to read. I enjoy the topics she addresses and her suggestions. Take time and visit her sight, if you haven’t been introduce to her style of creativity. You will not be disappointed.

I feel honored and grateful for Megha selecting my blog. I’ve learn much in the process of writing this blog Thank you very much for this recognition, Megha.

My questions for the blogs, I will recommend later, will be on part 2 of this post. Why? I don’t like to write long blogs and this one is super, duper long.

Here are my answers to Megha’s questions. 

Why did I get involved in writing?

Over ten years ago, my best-friend Julia sat and read a story of mine and said, “Lidia, this is good. Very good. Do you know how many people could be benefit from your story?”

I learned, my short stories did help others. Women, I  counsel, read my stories and receive comfort. I kept hearing over and over again that I should publish these stories. My friend’s and the women’s encouragement sent me on a quest to improve my writing skills.

Getting published is not an easy endeavor. For the last six years I’ve been learning everything I can to write well. Mistakes still slip, but they don’t stop me.

What event in my life taught me the most?

Keeping the theme of writing I would have to say, it was the evening God sent me to unburied my talent. It took a long journal entry to find the gift of storytelling. That same evening, a short story was born. Six years later, the story received first place at the Cascade Awards from the Oregon Christian Writers. 

This experience taught me to see myself as a true writer.

What is the one thing that I like about myself and why?

Wow! I had to think on this one, because it is something I don’t evaluate about myself. I would have to say, my ability to capture natures beauty through photography  and write an insert from the photo.

Nature captures my attention and sets my creative process free.

Who is my favorite writer and why?

My mentor, Marion Duckworth took me under her wing five years ago and didn’t give me slack as she edited my work. With every critique came hours of work. It wasn’t all about the written word, but the heart of writing. She would ask me questions like, why do I write and what message do I have to tell the world? Who is my audience?

The one question she asked often was, “Is writing a calling?”

If I would had said, “It’s a quest,” then she would have told me, “Then you can quit any time. But, if it’s a calling and you quit, then it’s all between you and God.” She doesn’t sugar coat anything. Always tells me like it needs to be heard. Without her and God, I wouldn’t be answering these questions.

Marion Duckworth, is ninety-one and she just published another book on kindle. She’s an amazing woman of God. 

What is the definition of being successful in life?

Honestly, success intimated me.  Why? Because success can shrink hearts and enlarges heads.

I would have to say, success is when one of my story helps many, yet it will not shrink my heart.

How do I handle fear?

My first instinct is run and hide the fear. Fear will climb on my shoulders, weighing me down, not allowing me to do what I desire to do. I’ve realized, if I face my fear and ask it questions, it actually can help me.

Here are some questions I ask fear when it appears. Why are you here? What is it that you don’t want me to see about myself? Where did you come from? If I know the answers to these questions then I know if it’s the past, present or the future that I’m trying to avoid.

Fear is a friend and not an enemy. It comes to warn me about myself more than others, or forces outside of me.

I do find myself wanting to tuck fear in the “later box” which, I keep in my heart, I still react and flee. This is something I’m still working on and possibly an ongoing task.

Would I change anything about me?

Me, in the inside, no! Because that’s who I really am and where my stories come from. Yet, me on the outside, must change, or the circumstances that come my way will devastate me. Even though I have lived fifty-nine years, life, always has something new to show me. My dog, who has passed away, taught me, that an old dog can learn new trick on his last year of his life. He had to learn to live with the cancer that killed him.

Our world is changing, if I don’t change then I will become brittled and my stories will not be read. Instagram and blogging has changed the way I think and write. They are kinda scary, but fear doesn’t cripple me anymore, it propels me to move forward.

Who is my favorite Author?

Honestly, I do not have one. I have never been able to say he or she is my favorite, beside the author of life. I’m a very different bird than most writers. Maybe it is because my brain is wired to be more of a mathematician than a writer.

Let me tell you, why Jesus is my favorite author, He is my example for living my life. He helps me write my stories and ideas. He keeps me striving to be better than I was yesterday. He teaches me when it’s time to adapt, change, improve and grow. He reminds me, that I can’t stay small. I must get taller, wider and deeper with my thinking and understanding or I will die inside.

What inspires me most about writing?

Two things, other writers. 

The second, stories which transform, inspire and move the heart of the reader. That’s magical.

Give myself a tagline.

“To be an illuminating lamp, who burns from the oils of gratitude and gladness.”

Thank yo for bearing with my long answers. Blessings.

 

A Box Marked – For Later

I keep a box in my heart and I almost used it today.

This morning my body whispered, “It’s a good day to stay in bed and sleep a little longer.” But the morning fog pulled me outside where I came face to face with a fear I haven’t over come. It was then when I realized, why I wanted to stay in bed.

Outside, I enjoyed the cool morning air, imagined itsy, bitsy snowflakes lingering about me and took a few pictures before returned home.

With the fear in mind, the end of a topic came to  mind. No beginning or middle, only the end. What ever I was about to write, it will end with acknowledging my fear.

I started my creative writing process. A short post on Instagram, editing  photos, and brain stormed topics for future projects while I ate my breakfast.

Before I sat down to write, I took care of a few shores and thought of how I should start the topic at hand, fear.

But, the idea didn’t develop.

Fist thought was, I’m procrastinating or writers’ block. Soon, I realized,  it was me, I didn’t want to write about the cause of my fear, because it was to real and fresh. I rather tuck it away in my “For later,” mental box.

When, would it be best to write about this topic?

Well, when my jitters would calm and the lump of fear in my throat has been swallowed and digested. Or after the winter snow has melted. Which ever comes first.

In side the ‘Later box,’ are many subjects which I’ refuse to write about. Why? Because, I’m not ready to experience the pain or disappointment again.

Yet, in order to write a compelling, moving piece, the struggle has to be real, not made up. Which means, I have to revisit the pain, the conflict, the experience to give my words life and spring forth feelings in the reader’s heart.

A well written piece, engages the reader’s mind, taps into their feelings and moves their heart. If I accomplish these difficult skills well, then I hope the reader could find resolution for similar circumstances.

Numerous times, I’ve started to write what’s on my heart only to never  finish the article or story. It hangs frozen in my mind. With time it’s forgotten.

Today, I didn’t want this topic to end in the box. So I asked myself a question.

Why do I abandon my ideas?

I  refuse to give a voice to my past struggles, hurts and pain out of fear that they may cripple me again. I remind myself, of who I believe in and how much stronger I am because of Christ in my life.

Remembering the past, is like reliving my life experiences, which some  of those memories, I rather forget. 

Yet, I’m learning that my sufferings have melodies whom some people can identify with. The areas which I’ve grown stronger could possibly help a reader moved forward from their struggle. Once, they understood how they too can face their fears or past hurts with the right help.

Hope, is important for the reader to regain. Therefor, I must have, a beginning, a middle and an end to show how to prevail as one hold on to hope.

Questions I ask myself today:

What am I really afraid of? And why?

Am  I comparing myself with anyone? Is it beneficial?

 

If yes, how did they get where they are?

What struggles did they faced to achieve their reward?

If, I focus only on their success, I’ve missed the essence of their story.

The same is true when I write my stories. If I only write about happiness, I left the reader dissatisfied. For they know, life is not all sweet.  Life is about the challenges as one pursuits happiness.

For we all are seeking ways to surpass, overcome, or hold on. We want to know how to get up when everything within us tells us to sleep our life away for we don’t matter.

One must understand and swallow the bitterness of doing what one doesn’t want to do in order to bring forth the sweetness of success.

I’m ready to seek not only for a strong engaging beginning, but a middle which the reader can identify with and a tangible, realistic, possible ending.

I, as the writer, must face the middle of my work and walk through he treacherous, dark and lonely times without fearing the end. The success of accomplishment.

With that being written, I‘m glad I started my day when I did, or else I wouldn’t have finished this blog today.

What about you, my friend? Where did you find yourself this morning, later in the day or maybe this evening? What were you avoiding and why? Are you willing to search your soul and face the truth? Don’t forget to call on God for help.

If you’re still in your robe, pick up your will and accomplish one thing. May that one task lead to another and then another and another. if not today, maybe tomorrow. Before you know, you’ll arrived at the end  of your task, and have faced your fear.

I acknowledge, I wasn’t avoiding pain, I was afraid of success.

Even though, I belief that I can do all things through Christ who strengths me, I still struggle with being successful.

I not only acknowledge what I’m afraid of, but I didn’t hide it away.

Without a doubt, I will finish my stories.  

Maybe, this article will act as a compass for you and guide you to arrive to your truth of why you are not getting out of bed in the mornings or finishing your project.

What are you avoiding?