“I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart; before the “gods” I will sing your praise. 2 I will bow down toward your holy temple and will praise your name for your unfailing love and your faithfulness, for you have so exalted your solemn decree that it surpasses your fame. 3 When I called, you answered me; you greatly emboldened me.” Psalm 138:1-3
Embolden – to give someone courage or confidence to behave a certain way
My sweet Lord I’ll praise you All day long With all my heart For all you’ve done Before man Or any god
My loving Lord I’ll sing of Your praises From the depths Of my soul Before man Or any god
My forever Lord I’ll bow down With all my being Praising your name Before your throne Before man Or any god
After I praise you After I sing of you After I bow down I then will dance Out of gratitude And love Before man Or any God
Your unfailing love Your faithfulness Your forgiveness Your healing Your comfort Your mercy Your grace Are forever
You are Exalted Dignified Sanctified You’ve Surpassed Your fame
With all your Glorious deity You lower Your heart To me and When I call You always Answer me
You my Lord My loving Lord You and No man Or any god You alone Lavishly Embolden My heart
Lord, I will praise you With all My heart, My soul, My being, All the days I shall live
When my spirit sends alarming signals before my brain fully awakes, panic usually follows. Worry sketched out memories of past hurts, disappoints or troubled times. Like a bulging suitcase, those experiences erupted screams in my head, causing a migraine. Before I knew it, they run rampant like rudely, undisciplined children. Past disasters resurrected, wracking my morning with darkness. I didn’t want to face the day.
In a prayer, I sent and SOS to the Lord before worry dresses my heart with apprehension. But panic opened the gate and I began to wonder, what have I forgotten to take care, which child is facing hardships, or will an old issue poke its head to destroy the peace and joy I have?
I wondered, why was my spirit troubled?
Then I asked the Lord, “What should I have done to prevent this unsettling feeling within me? Would being more watchful over my self instead of others, praying instead of playing, listening instead of photographing nature, time meditating instead of social media?
Something within me said, you should have been more astute. Astute, is not a word I use. I knew it was the Holy Spirit talking. I looked up the word, for I really didn’t know what it ment.
Then I heard, “Prepare yourself for the turbulence that’s coming.”
I asked, ” Lord, is this message from you?”
A confirming feeling came over me. Then, I knew why my soul was troubled.
The unpacked past issues came to mind again. I couldn’t stop them from painting their sketched images and adding a new possible scenario. Once, I sat down to journal the annoying voices were hushed away.
I was thankful, my Lord warned me or else apprehension would have come along and chained me with the heaviness of fear and the cloud of confusion.
A question entered my mind, is this really from God?
I stopped writing, I prayed, if this message is from you Lord, keep me astute, Then I will be watchful and ask you to help me when worry, apprehension, anxiety, confusion and fear crowd to enter my mind and fall into my heart. Please don’t allow me to become crippled by these hindrances and enslave me again.
After my prayer, my room became brighter as if the sky became bluer and the morning sun shined bright into the space I sat. Yet, the light gray blanket of clouds covered the sky and blocked the sun. Then I felt a warmth, much like the sun in summer landing on my back.
I told myself, if God permitted this disturbance to come my way today for my growth. Then I reminded myself of who held me, Jesus, He will protect and guide me as I lived on. Then the Holy Spirit led me to the verse in Philippians 2:13“For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.”
Today, May 6, I remind myself, trust God’s process, remain faithful and give no room for doubt or fear to reign. As soon as they show their presence, run to Jesus for help.
Fear was a god in my life, who I would obey without me realizing it. I listened and reacted to its triggers. But now those triggers send me to Jesus.
Pain will always be. The caused from the pain could be avoidable. But when love is involved, it may be more challenging to slide pass the pain. It can be managed with the correct dosage of relief.
Love will always bloom. It’s the caused of hearts admirations who may not always be suitable and avoided, yet the heart wants. It can blossom with much sacrifice, heartfelt dedication and caring fertilization, but it requires work form both individuals.
Pain comes from grasping what the heart wants, the flower.
“No one can say, “He jests at scars who never felt a wound,” for I have never got one moment been in a state of mind to which even the imagination of serious pain was less than intolerable. If any man is safe from the danger of under-estimating this adversary, I am that man. I must add, too, that the only purpose of the book is to solve the intellectual problem raised by suffering; for the far higher task of teaching fortitude and patience I was never fool enough to suppose myself qualified, not have I anything offer my readers except my condition that when pain is to be borne, a little courage helps more than much knowledge, a little human sympathy more than much courage, and the least tincture the love of God more than all.” From “The Problem of Pain” C. S. Lewis
Pain comes from suffering, discomfort, injury and wounds which are not only caused by the thorns of living, but by embracing what or whom one loves.
Even in love, pain can only be bared for so long before it cripples the heart, effecting the mind and in-prisoning the spirit. It is then when one can chose to act lovingly because it’s the right thing to do. While one lives experiencing hurtful thorns in the relationship, they may continue to accomplish what must get done as their spirit becomes fragile in a mindset of unworthiness out of duty and not so much out of love. One then exist in a mental cell, never living free to truly grasp the fullness of loving unconditionally.
What once was spontaneous romance, it becomes an expected reaction. What once was adoration, it becomes sights of hateful humiliation. What once was a breath of fresh intimacy, it becomes a toxic act of selfishness.
The blooming flower of any abusive relationship will wither at the edges. Soon the peddles of happiness vanish to not be felt again. What once was to be forever will frail apart, for the heart was never free to flourish, expand and grow into a mature love while romancing another’s heart.
What imprisons a soul is not always what one has done wrong, but what wrong has been done to the one with the caged up spirit.
How can one heal from such pain, abuse, circumstances?
First one must be freed. This freedom is not only physical, it is also spiritual. Both may be needed in order to feel safe. Through the help of a godly counsel, a person who is equipped with godly truths, the captive can hear words of healing. Even though the advice may bring further pain.
To heal a broken bone, more often than not surgery is a must. It is also true of a healing broken heart. Pain can cure pain. Managed pain can be a cure for unmanaged pain.
The ones who have been locked up by tormenting verbal abuse, threats of fearful actions, belittlement of their essence, physical scars of unspeakable tortures and reoccurring nightmares of past experiences need more than a therapist, they need a Savior. They need someone with the good news and the Spirit of the Lord God on them.
“The Spirit of the Lord God is on me, because the Lord has chosen me to bring good news to poor people. He has sent me to heal those with a sad heart. He has sent me to tell those who are being held and those in prison that they can go free.” Isaiah 61:1 NLT
Once the person has been spiritually freed then one can take the words of C. S. Lewis and meditate with much prayer to see how they can be apply to their hurting soul.
“It will take a little courage more than knowledge.” Within this little courage fear will exist.
“It will take a little human sympathy more than much courage.” With the little sympathy heart’s warm is felt.
“And the least tincture of the love of God more than all.” With the least bit of God’s love an overwhelming freedom appears.
Where can an impressoned soul get a little courage, a little human sympathy and a slight trace of the love of God? From the person the Lord has chosen to bring His good news.
The Lord will give the person’s sad heart joy, free to learn to love again and live a life of possibilities. Once the captive sees and accepts the Lord’s hand, the messenger must tell the one being held in hellish circumstance, that they can walk out and be free.
Once freed, there is where the healing begins. It will not be fast. One will be needing spiritual therapy. Continual mentoring exercises. With well-soul check-ups scheduled. One must learn to trust themselves to love again inspire of the thorns to come.
To guide someone to be spiritually free, one must have been set free themselves by the Lord Jesus Christ. These chosen people understand well the phrase, “He jets at scars who never felt a wound,” for they have felt the wound. These individulas know pain is caused by reaching to love the unlovable, to bare the unbearable, to give when there’s no more to give.
Yet these chosen people of God will stretch out their hand and give godly grace for they know what the cell room smells, feels and looks. They have empathy for those who are still captives in the cell. It’s an experience they will never forget nor ever want live through again.
ON A WARM ROCK ~ Psalm 40:1-3 “I waited a long time for the Eternal; He finally knelt down to hear me. He listened to my weak and whispered cry.He reached down and drew me from the deep, dark hole where I was stranded, mired in the muck and clay. With a gentle hand, He pulled me outTo set me down safely on a warm rock; He held me until I was steady enough to continue the journey again.As if that were not enough, because of Him my mind is clearing up.Now I have a new song to sing— a song of praise to the One who saved me.Because of what He’s done, many people will see and come to trust in the Eternal.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There has been times my waiting for my Lord felt like a dark tunnel without a way out. Yet I kept going searching for his hand and hoping to hear his foot steps. Maybe even the wings of his eagle as it comes to my rescue.
Many times, in my low hours, I cried for him as I felt alone. He comes. Always comes.
I’ve felt his touch, his warmth, his whisper. The picture this psalm describes of the Lord finally kneeling down to hear, it is what I’ve experienced and still experience.
His hand is gentle, his pull is kind and places me oh so tenderly on his warm rock. That warm rock, I usually describes it as his embrace, his lap, his heart. I know without a doubt and with every fiber of what makes me, that my Lord has come to my rescue over and over again.
When he holds me, its just not for me to regain my step, no, it’s to hold my lifeless soul, my weak spirit and my dwindled heart. Once I’ve regain my spiritual balance, my heart strengthens as it holds to God’s promises and my soul is filled with the hope that carries one to tomorrow.
It is then when I walk with my Lord as we lock arms that my mind becomes clear. For I know he is with we as I continue in the darkness of today’s unknown. For it isn’t what I can see or understand, but the hope of what God is doing that gives me a positive outlook at a distrustful time.
Then a song comes, it always has and it sings my heart and feels my mood, but someone else wrote the word and played out the rhythm. Time after time, I’m still amazed how God works it out for the song comes on the radio, pandora, or someone sends it at that hour.
I worship a living God and serve a risen Lord and listen to a flowing Holy Sprit. No one can ever take my faith, my belief nor my hope from me. Because of what the Lord Jesus Christ has done for me every season of my life, even today, I can say he rescues, teaches and guides. Everything the Scriptures say about my Lord, is who my Savior is and what he does for those who follow him and worship God.
I pray that if you do not know God, his Son and the Holy Spirit, that you come to trust in the Eternal and experience his majestic love, his forever forgiveness and his everlasting assurance.
LOOK AND WAIT FOR TRUTH ~ Before taking any steps of action based on present feelings, God can lead and teach one to find peace, joy and hope in the uncertanty of tomorrow.
Psalm 25:5 Lead me in thy truth, and teach me: for thou art the God of my salvation; on thee do I wait all the day.
It isn’t easy waiting on a result one can’t control. And honestly, many time it isn’t easy waiting on the Lord to work things out for us, my husband, me, my kids, family or dear friends.
But, every time, the answer, solution or remedy comes. Not always what I expected, but always something that was the best under the circumstances for the individual or individuals involved.
Only in time I’ve seen the many benefits on allowing God to lead me and teach me in my waiting periods which have been many even till today.
He has always come through. Many times God shows up through friends. Or an unexpected invitation to go explore, fish and fellowship with others.
God is teaching me the importance of staying involved with caring and loving people in my life. He’s leading and teaching me into building lasting relationships with deep roots and with plenty of room for growth.
Without dear friends, like Lori, I would not only have a void and sleep days away, but struggle to remain strong in my storms.
Grateful to know Lori and her husband, Jeff. They are a blessing in my husband and my life.
Woke up with the phrase, “thoughts can kill you or heal you,” and it wouldn’t leave me alone.
Seeking undestanding, I ask the Lord, “is this a theme for a story or something else?”
As I spent my quiet time, the phrase return and it brought another idea along. Not finding the proper words to put on this feeling, I looked for a photo to help me identify what the Holy Spirit was telling me.
When I saw the leaf, a question formed, “Is the leaf giving up or letting go?”
Knowing how God works and moves me or should I say pushes me to act upon what He sees in me, I knew a reminder was being handed for my mind.
Will I be giving up what has been done in me? Or letting go and accept the change which is in hand?
Many times, I fight thoughts which push me to give up and let the dream die.
It’s a real, true struggle within me!!!
One which produces melancholy even after workouts, walks and being out in nature for hours. Usually God wakes my spirit and soon I get myself moving by doing my duties of laundry and cleaning or paying bills.
My self talk goes something like this, “Lidia, you’re a grown woman, just keep taking steps. How else can you be a witness of what you’ve said you are in Christ?”
Why am telling you this? Because I’m not alone fighting a battle which we’ve been told it’s won. Yet, no relief has come. It diverted and missed us. Well, it feels like it has for what ever reason.
Instead of standing strong against the enemy. I do as he wants, be in the front battle zone fighting for my right to be who God said I am.
For many of us, the war exist in our head more than in our heart.
We struggle with thoughts which are killing us, inside out. Once our will is done with, we have no reason to exist. Meditate on God words, are daily pills, but our thoughts of redemption and healing remain dried up. (Rom. 12:2)
Then the dagger hits home, Hope is for others, not for me.
I shared my reoccurring waking thought with a friend over coffee this morning. I mention that I wasn’t sure if it was for a story. She suggested to write a story about twins, one with the name Ican’t and the other Ican.
After she left, I had my quiet time. It was them when I saw these twins, joined by one heart, in me.
Who will win?
The one who will remain standing strong and walk in the newness of who she has become.
Is it easy? Nope. I will confront that solid steep mountian God told me about.
It will seem unclimbable before me, but with the Lord’s help, I will get to the other side which is labeled, “accomplishement.”
Not sure what you’re struggling and doing battle with today, but be assured you are not alone even though it’s a lonesome road.
Today will you chose with me to dwell and meditate on the Victory which the Lord conquered for us through His resurrection?
Let’s encourage each other today as we stand with the banner of victory on our spear then walk in faith on what has already been done and accomplished in us. (Heb. 3:13)
You maybe on a different road, but we’re facing the same enemy. Let’s keep in mind the enemy is not only finished but CONQUERED! (John 19:30)
Remember, as children when we got in trouble, we were sent to timeout?
As a parent, I would tell my kids to think about what they did wrong. While the child sat, they would have to stay there until they, themselves, identified their error and understood the correct manner of behavior. Which I had already explain to them, but they had to own their choice and decide to make better choices in the future.
Without knowing why, today, my soul was troubled, I had the urge to go for a drive and have a timeout. Expecting to learn the error of my ways I desired to find a place out in nature to listen to what God had taught me and seem to be trying to remind me. Eagle River, Alaska came to mind. Being a place where bears are cited, I invited a friend and off we went. (We didn’t see any bears, which we were thankful after learning that this was the time for brown bears and grizzlies to be passing through to feed from the salmon runs.)
Before leaving my place, I took time to read my devotional. As soon as I read the verses, I had the urge to leave, now. Without reading any further, I left with three questions packed in my heart. What should I be asking? What should I be seeking? And where should I be knocking? Eagerly I drove, expecting to hear definite answers from God at some point on the hike but, none came.
For those of you who know the passage, the verses were from Matthew 7:7-8 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.” They’re familiar verses in the Christian community, but for me this time they had something new to teach me. I just didn’t know exactly what that lesson was, because I hadn’t identify where I stood with God.
Seating and pondering on my day in Eagle River, which I didn’t receive answers or clarity of these verses or my errored ways, I read the rest of the devotional. It reminded me to be persistent in asking and that Jesus doesn’t recommend for us to ask, He commands for us to ask. Now that’s something to think about for my future timeout from my day.
The devotional also said, that asking isn’t quite sufficient from Jesus’ point of view. He wants us to take it up a notch. We should seek out what we need from God and we will find it. Well asking is much less work than seeking, because one doesn’t have to do anything. While seeking takes our effort not just God’s. There are times, I just want the answer without much work on my part.
Do you remember asking your mom for something you know she could easily give you, but she sent you out to find it yourself and then get it on your own? Well I’m wondering if that’s what God was trying to tell me, when I rather for Him to just hand it to me. I still wonder, what is it that I truly want? I sense I must go on to the third question maybe I will receive clarity.
Knocking on the door is the final step. Well the devotional reference that the door is heaven’s door. It also mention that our asking and seeking takes us to the very doorsteps of heaven. Once there, we shouldn’t just stand there and wait, we should knock on the door. Well to tell you the truth, I’ve been afraid to knock on the door. Why? Because of what God has to offer.
What if God gives me my heart desire only to be taken away. Maybe, I don’t want to feel that pain again, so I will not knock, then I keep what I long for in the longing place of my heart. No wonder I felt like a timeout. I needed to see the error of my thinking and correct it with truth. It is better to have had it for a short while than not to have it at all. Besides, who told me that it will be taken again and why bother having it in the first place? Who have I been listening to? Whom have I followed? I’ve listen to the voices of Doubt, Disappointment and Fear.
They misguided me because of the troubles that have come and taken the good things my husband and I have been blessed with in Vancouver. We placed our house on the market and sold within twelve hours. We had to leave quickly that we didn’t have time to say good-bye to our friends. The move-out happened in less than two weeks from our return of our working travels. Our belongings were stuffed in storage and off we flew to Alaska to work again.
Now, we are homeless and have no idea where to plant our life and allow roots to grow. You see, I have lived in almost twenty places in thirty-five years of marriage which includes less than ten city moves and seven states covering from Texas to Maryland to Montana to Washington and now Alaska.
Do you see why I’m shy to knock and ask where should I be seeking residency? At the moment, we’re staying in an Airbnb in Alaska provided by my husband’s work. When he’s not working we’ll be staying with my daughter in Seattle, Washington.
I know once I knock on the door of heaven, it will be open. God will meet me and He will provide the answer. But, will it be the answer I seek? Or will He offer me the answer which is best to produce the fruits that are needed? I also know, that God will hand my husband and I not only what we need but gift us with more, with the purpose of sharing. All things do come from his storehouse and he will place the gifts into our hands for us and for us to share.
I understand. It’s not about finding residency, a house to call home or having a dwelling place. It’s about asking and seeking where does God want us, my husband and I to bear fruit. Like the devotional said, all of our persistent asking, seeking and knocking shows God that we are serious and sincere about our desire to bear fruits like John teaches.
John 15:16 “You have not chosen Me, I have chosen you. I have set you apart for the work of bringing in fruit. Your fruit should last. And whatever you ask the Father in My name, He will give it to you.”
Am I ready to ask, seek and knock? I am. I’ve recognize the error of my ways, listening and believing the voices of Doubt, Disappointment and Fear instead of the voice of my Shepard, Jesus himself. I should trust Him with our future, my husbands and mine as a couple and mine as an individual.
Father, In Jesus name I come and ask to show me the way my husband and I should go and where to plant our lives to bear fruit, so that you can feed those who hunger after your precepts and desire to draw closer to you plus, to learn about your Son, the one who saves, died and rose again, Jesus, who conquered our sins, who forgives without our cost. for He paid it all. Thank you for choosing me. In Jesus name I ask, seek and knock. And in His name I wait to find a home to share of what God has in store for my husband and me.