What I’ve learned

What I’ve learned

How to declutter. Release your fisted hand, let go and walk away. Do it again and again even if it hurts. Otherwise, you will bring a replacement on your way-back home. Philippians 3:13-14

How to mend relationships. Talk less. Listen as if you were the one talking. Give advice only if they ask. Pray for them silently as you listen. Also pray for yourself not to bud in on God’s business, not until he gives you clarity on what to do or say. Galatians 6:2

How to improve self talk. This is an on going process. In the meantime repeat God’s truths over yourself. Don’t give the microphone to the voices of your insecurities, fears and doubts. Or they will shout lies over truths. Mark 11:22-24

How to get motivated. I don’t know. Maybe, you can help me. But, I think it has more to do with wanting to workout the change, the letting go, the listening and praying and improving self talk than motivation. Because, once the block has been removed, the desire to get things done will get done. What has been piled up in our home,  on our desk or in our heart will get cleared. Romans 12:2

How to keep believing in God. I look back as I step forward. Why? Because I’ve see where he has gotten me out of, provided for me, and raised me from. As I take steps forward, doubt, fear, insecurities, worry, anxiety, disbelief in the present moment diminish. I then will not loose my reliance on Whom it has been placed on. If I begin to feel my knees weakening, I call for his hand, my Lord’s hand, Jesus the keeper of my soul. He keeps me from returning and reliving hurt, pain, misery not all caused by self. His Holy Spirit reminds me of my new qualities and strengths. I then can walk the tight rope, up high with a balance of truths and confidence. Romans 8:28

Believe me, days still come with fog and darkness. I do find myself crawling on my belly. Yet, I don’t loose sight of my belief in God, His son and the Holy Spirit. I know, soon aid will come replenishing my soul and setting my feet on high ground. It will happen again and again and again as long as I keep calling him, Jesus, my Savior and Lord. Joshua 1:9

How I keep my eyes focus on what is yet to come. What is coming brings change. Change is a road, a path, an open door, an opportunity to move forward.  Returning to where once I had been has been for the purpose to celebrate the growth, forgive what still hinders, take back the good I left behind and be thankful for the lessons learned. Philippians 4:6-7

What have you learned?

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Put Up With One Another

Pray Pardon Prosper

“Put up with one another. Forgive. Pardon any offenses against one another, as the Lord has pardoned you, because you should act in kind.” Colossians 3:13 (The Voice)

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To put up with one another, one has to have a triple tune-up; in the heart, of the mind and from the attitude. In order to get the tune up, one must go to the best adjuster. I only know of one, Jesus.

Many times we need more than a tune-up to put up with those we love.The following also may need to be looked at:

1) A total overhaul. There could be major repairs to be considered which have been overlooked for years. Like years, 10, 20, 30 maybe even since childhood.

2) A quick refurbish. They may only be the need of an adjustment. The stress from a new job, newborn baby, low bank account, high credit card bill. Or just plainly the stress of marriage, parenting, or any other relationship along with the stresses mention above.

3) A costly remodel. This means a major fix up. What once worked is no longer working. People grow, mature, change revealing the need of new ways to deal with the present circumstances while others are stagnant, stuck, stubborn. It’s costly because most of us like the way we deal with others and feel the other person should change and not us. Well, think again! This is where it will cost, when we are the ones who must be remodel and we aren’t willing. God help us!

4) A humble Patch up. Restoring is when something worked well, but now it has a tare, a crack, or a hole which been over looked. Time and wearing down caused some wear and tear. Now they’re noticeable with the need to be covered with the same agreements. Together the loop holes must be recognized allowing proper time for healing and restoration.

5) A true revise. Reworking is going back and starting all over again. But, the start begins with a changed plan. Starting again with the same agreements, which didn’t work to begin with, will only produce more frustrations. A revision will have to be made or the error will occur again and again. Honesty is best, even if it’s fearful. It’s pricey to be frank.

Relationships are hard work. Maintaince is a must. Tune ups of ourselves have to be made.

Sometimes, we just have to put ourselves in the shop with God and tell Him do the works on me.

We may need to take a sabbatical.

All this to say, forgive, forgive again, forgive seventy times seven.

Actually forgive as often as the person who turned the heat up in the realtionship to 80 while you were already sweating anger and frustration.

By the way, forgive yourself for storming to the person holding your dial.

Cause and effect goes both ways. They hurt you. You hurt them. Come together to God, if possible. Be pardon, then pardon. Remember we’re sinner just as much as the person who raise the heat on our thermostat.

Forgive. Forgive. Forgive.

Pardon. Pardon. Pardon.

Release. Release. Release.

So, put up with one another, as you are kind with your words, your actions and in your secret thoughts.

Pray often. Pardon always. Prosper with love.

Pain Is Not Only Caused by Thorns

Pain will always be. The caused from the pain could be avoidable. But when love is involved, it may be more challenging to slide pass the pain. It can be managed with the correct dosage of relief.

Love will always bloom. It’s the caused of hearts admirations who may not always be suitable and avoided, yet the heart wants. It can blossom with much sacrifice, heartfelt dedication and caring fertilization, but it requires work form both individuals.

Pain comes from grasping what the heart wants, the flower.

“No one can say, “He jests at scars who never felt a wound,” for I have never got one moment been in a state of mind to which even the imagination of serious pain was less than intolerable. If any man is safe from the danger of under-estimating this adversary, I am that man. I must add, too, that the only purpose of the book is to solve the intellectual problem raised by suffering; for the far higher task of teaching fortitude and patience I was never fool enough to suppose myself qualified, not have I anything offer my readers except my condition that when pain is to be borne, a little courage helps more than much knowledge, a little human sympathy more than much courage, and the least tincture the love of God more than all.” From “The Problem of Pain” C. S. Lewis

Pain comes from suffering, discomfort, injury and wounds which are not only caused by the thorns of living, but by embracing what or whom one loves.

Even in love, pain can only be bared for so long before it cripples the heart, effecting the mind and in-prisoning the spirit. It is then when one can chose to act lovingly because it’s the right thing to do. While one lives experiencing hurtful thorns in the relationship, they may continue to accomplish what must get done as their spirit becomes fragile in a mindset of unworthiness out of duty and not so much out of love. One then exist in a mental cell, never living free to truly grasp the fullness of loving unconditionally.

What once was spontaneous romance, it becomes an expected reaction. What once was adoration, it becomes sights of hateful humiliation. What once was a breath of fresh intimacy, it becomes a toxic act of selfishness.

The blooming flower of any abusive relationship will wither at the edges. Soon the peddles of happiness vanish to not be felt again. What once was to be forever will frail apart, for the heart was never free to flourish, expand and grow into a mature love while romancing another’s heart.

What imprisons a soul is not always what one has done wrong, but what wrong has been done to the one with the caged up spirit.

How can one heal from such pain, abuse, circumstances?

First one must be freed. This freedom is not only physical, it is also spiritual. Both may be needed in order to feel safe. Through the help of a godly counsel, a person who is equipped with godly truths, the captive can hear words of healing. Even though the advice may bring further pain.

To heal a broken bone, more often than not surgery is a must. It is also true of a healing broken heart. Pain can cure pain. Managed pain can be a cure for unmanaged pain.

The ones who have been locked up by tormenting verbal abuse, threats of fearful actions, belittlement of their essence, physical scars of unspeakable tortures and reoccurring nightmares of past experiences need more than a therapist, they need a Savior. They need someone with the good news and the Spirit of the Lord God on them.

“The Spirit of the Lord God is on me, because the Lord has chosen me to bring good news to poor people. He has sent me to heal those with a sad heart. He has sent me to tell those who are being held and those in prison that they can go free.” Isaiah 61:1 NLT

Once the person has been spiritually freed then one can take the words of C. S. Lewis and meditate with much prayer to see how they can be apply to their hurting soul.

“It will take a little courage more than knowledge.” Within this little courage fear will exist.

“It will take a little human sympathy more than much courage.” With the little sympathy heart’s warm is felt.

“And the least tincture of the love of God more than all.” With the least bit of God’s love an overwhelming freedom appears.

Where can an impressoned soul get a little courage, a little human sympathy and a slight trace of the love of God? From the person the Lord has chosen to bring His good news.

The Lord will give the person’s sad heart joy, free to learn to love again and live a life of possibilities. Once the captive sees and accepts the Lord’s hand, the messenger must tell the one being held in hellish circumstance, that they can walk out and be free.

Once freed, there is where the healing begins. It will not be fast. One will be needing spiritual therapy. Continual mentoring exercises. With well-soul check-ups scheduled. One must learn to trust themselves to love again inspire of the thorns to come.

To guide someone to be spiritually free, one must have been set free themselves by the Lord Jesus Christ. These chosen people understand well the phrase, “He jets at scars who never felt a wound,” for they have felt the wound. These individulas know pain is caused by reaching to love the unlovable, to bare the unbearable, to give when there’s no more to give.

Yet these chosen people of God will stretch out their hand and give godly grace for they know what the cell room smells, feels and looks. They have empathy for those who are still captives in the cell. It’s an experience they will never forget nor ever want live through again.

Be Humble

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TODAY ~ What are you thinking about yourself?

An old advice given to us all:
Don’t think of yourself higher than you should. Instead, with sober judgment, think according to the faith each of you have been given. (Romans 12:3)

Don’t judge others on their thinking. Also, don’t be harsh with yourself.

If you desire to reach different thoughts of others and yourself as God to increase your faith of what’s to come.

Change happens every sunrise, every sunset. Every day, every night. Every hour, every minute.

Souls, hearts, minds are changeable if one is willing to hear, listen and be humble.

Will you be humble?

When I’m Weak, I’m Strong

20190413_093341-1.jpgThere are days, which I’m more than ready to go full stride with my writing without telling myself, “believe, believe in your giftedness.”

Then there are those days, like yesterday, which all I could do was to muster enough will power and not get lost on the path which I’ve been on many times. The path which accomplishes nothing.

I pushed myself to move, only to have felt the dragging of my steps in familiar groves. Fear of stumbling in the old rut of ‘lack of trust’ or twist my ankle from a previous deep footprint of ‘doubt’ entered my heart. I struggled all day and didn’t return to the road of progress, which I had hoped to be on.

On days like yesterday, I normally repeat to myself, Lord, I believe, please, oh please help my unbelief. Honestly, this prayer didn’t even cross my mind. For some reason I kept expecting something bad to happen. I couldn’t stay focus on anything long enough to do or accomplish what I long, to write, to be creative or even go for a walk. My body became fatigued. All I wanted was to return to bed and sleep. By the end of the day, I was exhausted.

Today, the verse about, “My Grace is sufficient,” came to mind.

My spirit remarked with sarcasm, really Lord? I don’t think so.

I went ahead and looked up the verse, for I didn’t recall the whole passage.

“Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:8-9

When I read, “three times,” I felt my spirit harden. It told me, “I’m not asking three times. It should have been taken care of the first time, we asked “three times.” Why must the wait have to occur, every time? Why? I’m tire of waiting.”

For some reason, a spirit of pessimism overcame me.

I wondered, where in the heck did, I pick up this spirit? Or did it just floated my way and decided I was a perfect candidate? Well, I don’t know. But, wanting to get some writing done today, I thought I should do as Paul wrote, “boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” Maybe then this spirit would leave me, and my mindset be on Whom and what I believe God can do through me.

It’s difficult to write when low self-esteemed conversations arise over shadowing my creativity, and questions of my true ability drown the little confidence I hold inside. The idea of being a good writer quickly slips from my grasp, when my weakness of spelling, grammar and punctuation face me each time. Plus, the fact that the proper words I want to use don’t fruition quickly, only concepts float in my mind which frustrate my heart. Last, the critique in me wins more often than I care to admit, leaving me defeated.

Often, I ask myself, “why do you need to be perfect and want man’s approval when you have both in Christ?”

My mentors’ advice return, “write Lidia, just write. Don’t worry about the errors, go ahead and tell the story. Later, return and rewrite with the help of others.”

But I don’t want others to see my mistakes. Which in itself is another weakness of mine. Yikes! Why Lord, why do you fill my head with stories that I can’t finish and at times not even start? I don’t understand, why you gifted me with this talent of story-teller?

The Lord reminded me of His Grace as I struggle with the assurance of what God sees in me.

With truth, I responded, “Yes, Lord. I know your grace is sufficient.”

Then, I heard in my spirit my Lord say, “Lidia why don’t you do what Paul did, delight in weaknesses, in insult, in hardships in persecutions, in difficulties. It’s not a delight of your weakness, but while you are in the state of being weak, delight in the knowledge that my grace is sufficient and allow the errors to be made. In other words, trust me as you obey and make mistakes. All you need to do is believe Paul’s words. Believe, when Lidia is weak, then Lidia is strong.”

Truthfully Lord, it makes no scenes to me. How in my weakness, can I be strong? How will your grace be sufficient for me? I do understand your power, yet not how it is made perfect in my weakness. Could you allow the Holy Spirit to help me understand your “grace?”

I heard my Lord say, “My Grace is many things, but here it refers to dexterity. Through my Grace you will receive the ability for the artistry which I’ve blessed you with. When you face the struggles, challenges, insults, difficulties and persecutions, I will give you the tact require to be strong as you hold on and accomplish each story.

Believe in me, in spite of your disbelief in yourself. Write and accomplish the stories.”

Lord, bring me back to this lesson when my will doesn’t want to obey, my spirit toys with disbelief and when self struggles with my old ways of thought for they return only to taunt me. I don’t want the struggle of my weaknesses, but I do desire for your divine power to be seen in me and through me so that many will trust in you.

Therefore, I will learn to say, “For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

THE DESIRABLE ROAD AHEAD

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Incase, you want to know why I try to post positive and uplifting words and scripture?

Because they are my personal road map to myself.

Otherwise, the negative, put down, and hindering voices make me doubt on where to head. When they come, they not only want to hang around, but navigate my life. Telling me to go back where I came from.

Often, I return to a previous post only to read what I have told myself, slamming the door on the voices of doubt, insecurity, fear and insignificance.

With the Lord’s confidence, I remind myself, I am no longer that small, timid, shrinking back latina girl.

More and more, I voice, “I am bold and courageous and daring. I’m a pillar of fire whom can’t easily be put out.

I know God has gifted me with the ability to express my thoughts and see beauty to photograph.

Through my photography I soar like an eagle as I explore where life takes me. At places where the Lord allows my feet to walk, His Spirit helps me see the beauty around.

I only need to listen and go where the light shines and the wind moves. There, I see what God wants me to see and I can’t wait to share my finds and words here with you.

Thank you for taking the time to read my thoughts. God bless each of you.

WARNING ~ Nature Humbles

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Keep in mind, once you cross, you must return with less. Otherwise, how else will you be able to fit through that small passage and come back?

Seriously, being out in nature can help shrinks problems, lessens troubles, relieves tension, plus reduce our waist line, if we adjusts our perspectives.

WARNING! Being out in the wild-of-less, it’s a humbling experience.

Conversing With Self

Hurry! Go.  My soul whispered.

I rushed to where the fire danced and popped. It seemed unreal. Mesmerized, I squatted. In my mind, I stepped into the cozy hot coals. The bitter winter cold vanished even though the ruby-red flames contrasted against the grand gray snowy mountains around me.

Sounds from people, family and friend diminished. Mesmerized by the fluorescent red coals, I existed alone. While the fire burned, I listened within myself.

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Self: “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

Me: Yes, like a ruby melting and reforming. If only I could stay here and write.

Self: “What would you write about?”

Me: “I’m not sure, for I haven’t been able to continue writing my stories. Silent, they hang on the tips of the roof of my mind like ice-cycles. I’m afraid they will melt and vanish one day. I will be left with the knowledge that I once had unfinished stories.”

Self: “Why do you suppose, they are no longer speaking to you?”

Me: “Not sure. Many times, I’ve quiet myself and sat in front of my lap top and nothing, not one peep. The only sound I hear is of an unseen ocean with my beating heart out there drifting on a boat.”

Self: “Why have you distance your heart from your stories? What are you afraid of?”

Me: “I’ve not distant my heart, wait, do you think I did this? No, I didn’t place my heart out in the ocean.”

Self: “Lidia, be real. Be truthful. See, your heart. You are the only one who can place your heart out in the ocean. Look out there for the boat. Don’t look away. Your fear could be telling you truth. You are afraid of truth. That’s why you allowed your heart to drift from your stories.”

Me: “Fear lies.”

Self: “Not all fear lies. This fear of yours is true. You’re not a good writer. Yet you are a good story-teller. Focus on the story, Lidia, just like your friends tell you.”

Me: “I’m tired of not writing well. I want to have a well written story, but my enthusiasm dies too soon after I get started.”

Self: “You have to learn to keep writing when the energy of the idea runs out. Don’t allow your story to become foreign to your own heart. Keep it close to you, pluck scenarios, story lines, details, thoughts and feelings of the character even if they may never make into the story. You have to keep the story alive. That’s your job. It’s your baby. If you don’t feed it, it will vanish. Now, start the fire and allow your story ice-cycles to melt and flow again. You have been given a gift to tell stories like no one else. Write and let someone else correct your errors. You will not create a perfect story. No one can, not alone. But you can crank on your generator.”

Me: “But, my fingers won’t move.”

Self: “Yes, your finger and thoughts will be stiff because of the cold of not being perfect. But, in no time the heat will get going and your thoughts will flow the story will breath and pump red blood again. Once it thaws out, details will drop into your mind as the ice-cycle melts. Get the page ready to catch the ideas. Remember, as you keep telling stories, your writing will become stronger.”

Me: “Thank you, for the talk.”

Self: “Don’t worry, I will remind you again, when I see that you’ve removed your heart for your stories. You are not just writing for others, but for me, self.”

Footsteps crunched the snow behind me. I came back to my surroundings. I heard my husband distant voice, “Are you coming and sledding or are you staying.”

With a smile, I answered, “I’m coming.”

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I started this blog back in December, and it wasn’t until today that I was able to finish it. It’s a major accomplishment for me. I’ve struggled with my writing for over a year. There are at least twelve unfinished stories on my files and I can’t seem to finish any one of them. From this self-reflection, I’ve learned that it wasn’t fear that kept me from my stories, instead it was truth.

Writing my blog posts, have been a great exercise to build my confidence and improve my writing skills. With short entries, I have less misspell words, less grammar errors and less wrong word usage. I still get wordy, but my skills are improving alongside my belief in my abilities to give what’s in my heart a voice.

To write a book, it’s much more challenging and difficult than a blog. But, if I can treat each couple of pages as a blog post, I might get myself going again and finish my next book. Now which of the twelve stories should I start constructing again?

Maybe, I will blog about my journey as I write my next book.

To be continued . . .

 

 

 

 

The Dangers of holding Yourself Back

Stifling Dreams Create Nightmares

20180120_153624.jpgWhat talent am I suffocating, because of what if it takes off?

What ability am I quenching, because of what others may think of me?

What inspiration am I killing, because of what if it succeed?

Stifling our creativity harms not only ourselves, but those whom would have benefited from our work.

In a sense, we are not only killing our growth by withholding inspiration from the world around us, but we are keeping ourselves in the darkness of hopelessness.

Breakthroughs from stifle thinking, not only brings dreams alive, but give light for many other souls to hope again through our gifts, talents and works.

Be creative, spread insight, possibilities and imagination.

Allow your dream to take flight.

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Fenced, Chained and Locked

20170103_073940.jpgFENCED, CHAINED AND LOCKED ~ Here is where I find myself more often than I want. The good thing is, it’s happening less and less as I discover what binds me down.

Many times I know what keeps me from escaping the prison I find myself in. It’s those darn fears, crippling insecurities, blinding doubts, and the cutting words of whom I’ve given power over me.

The question is what’s binding me today? Why can’t I get to where I want to be? Why is it that the work I honestly want to get done, seems impossible to reach?

It’s not all about the will, or the heart or even the mind that stops me. It’s what I’ve been told and have accepted as truth, which isn’t mine. The words which have been spoken over me, may have a ring of truth, but they have been dunk in the murky water of guilt and control.

Have you notice, that once you’ve accepted a truth from a love one, it weight you down? It may have not been noticeable right away, but in time you began to wonder, why am I moping around and not getting things done?

Then you give yourself that pep talk which has helped you before, but you find that it’s not working. As a faith person, you’ve cried out to God and ask him for help. Which He’s faithfulness never has let you down. Even so, the familiar pressure of the chain of hinderance wrap itself tighter and tighter around your mind, heart and eventually your soul. What do you do then?

Here is what I do, I pray and wait for God’s faithfulness to help me find what keeping in bondage. In the mean time I journal. If enlightenment of what weights me down doesn’t come, I call my mentor or a friend, whom knows my struggles and ask for prayer and insight.

Today, it was words, which held some truth but have been dunked in the murky water of guilt, jealousy, envy and control. I was made aware, to take responsibility of my neglects without the negativity that came with the truth.

What’s weighing you down? Why aren’t you able to accomplish the tasks you need to do or the projects you desire to do? Whom or what are you believing about your present self?

May you find the truth which unlocks the lock. May the chains of falsehood fall from your mind, heart and soul. But most important, may Truth set you free to take care of your responsibilities and to use your gift to your potential.

God bless you.